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Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Washington Post Mensa Invitational?

Every once in a while I get some good jokes, videos, games, etc. from my friends. There is one that I seem to get every year and I started wondering if this thing really exists. It is usually called the Washington Post Mensa Invitational. This time my good friend Christina Pulawski sent it to me. She usually sends me only great stuff that makes me laugh out loud.

Well, it doesn´t exist really. I mean something like it exists and it is called The Style Invitational and it is part of the Washington Post.

This is a weekly game in which the grand prize is a trophy called The Inker and maybe some other small prize that may have something to do with that week´s contest and that are also given to the 1st runners up. The other runners up get a Style Invitational Loser T-shirt. Honorable mentions could get a magnate.

It is not always based on writing. In fact, week #713 is titled Paintings. If you go to week #713 you are going to see a picture making reference to a winner from a year ago who took a picture of his feet, or tried to anyway.

You can go -here- to see what this weeks contest is.

Meanwhile you can also take a look at the following list, which I think is actually from 2005 as opposed to 2006 like it says in this recycled e-mail.

I did find them funny though. Don´t worry, you might see them every year in your mailbox. At least now you can tell whomever it is that is sending these things to you that you know the Mensa Invitational doesn´t exist really, sort of.

Here is the Washington Post's Mensa Invitational, which once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter and supplying a new definition.


The 2006 winners are:


1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying (or building) a house, which
renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period
of time.

2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until
you realize that it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops
bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows
little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of
getting laid.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the
person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running
late.

10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra
credit.)

12. Karmageddon: It's when everybody is sending off all these really
bad vibes, and then the Earth explodes and it's a serious bummer.

13. Decafalon: (n.): The grueling event of getting through the
day consuming only things that are good for you.

14. Glibido: All talk and no action.

15. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when
they come at you rapidly.

16. Arachnoleptic Fit ( n.): The frantic dance performed just after
you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into
your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in
the fruit you're eating.

2 comments:

fotherington said...

Thanks - I just got this from a colleague too, and smelt urban legend. For those with an interest in funny new definitions, I recommend The Uxbridge English Dictionary, (extract available at http://www.harpercollins.co.uk/Resources/extracts/ex_ch_Uxbridge_English_Dictionary.pdf)

Unknown said...

Hi Tom,

Thanks! It was very funny. For those of you who can not see the link above here it is:

Uxbridge English Dictionary